A storm blows through my mind,
I am dragged away to the past, present, and future.
Memories are grabbing hold of me like the cold iron fist of winter.
Worry engulfs me as if I am drowning in a lake, the fear is overwhelming.
My energy is shaking like a shaved sheep in the bitter night of early spring. Yet deep underneath all of this turmoil in my confused turbulent mind I can see a glimmer.
A glimmer of hope.
I need to dig deep underneath the soil, getting my hands dirty, leafs in my hair, a kind of wild look on my face as I dig deeper then I ever have.
But the more I want this glimmer the deeper I need to dig, it never seems to stop.
This glimmer of hope keeps eluding me like I am trying to grasp air with my bare hands.
Each time my hands closes I peek inside as if I finally got it, but nothing is there.
I am tired of digging, tired of the storm in my mind, tired, oh so tired….
I finally give up, my doubt as big as the tallest mountain, doubt that I am not strong enough like an ox to dig.
I fall on the moss, moistened by my tears, giving up, I let go.
The earth starts to shake, suddenly the clouds depart and the sun shines in all its glory.
My eyes are closed, a light deep inside, heat blazes through me, devouring all my doubt and my turbulent mind.
Layers upon layers are just falling away like castles made by playing cards. Nothing is left, I am naked.
The truth shines right into my heart, just Be, just Be, just Be, it is whispering.
Digging for the Truth – A Glimmer of Hope, excerpt from “The Inner Heart of Reiki – Rediscovering Your True Self” by Frans Stiene.